here

After my ritual of looking forward to this trip all year, I'm here. I'm in Salt Lake, en route to Rexburg first to visit Dave's parents (can't wait to see you guys!), then back for some photoshoots, then on to my luscious Bear Lake. We do Bear Lake every summer and I can't get enough of it. We grew up living there from the time school got out until it started again and I don't want my kids to miss out having at least a taste of that. And the best thing is that we don't have to go back to that blasted heat at home until August. Yeehaw.

I'm here with Lu. Dave decided after a few precious car rides together that he'd rather fly the two of us up and drive with all the other kids himself than drive with her shenanigans for hours on end. Yep, in alternative to driving on a long road trip with Lu he'd also rather walk into a fiery furnace or poke his eyes out with hot coals. You get the picture. SO, Lu and I had a leisurely flight up last night, and we get a day here while Dave toughs it out with the other kids. What a trooper.

What led up to our flight though was pretty much what I'd call tough. It's not easy to pack up a house and five kids for a month, let alone keep up with all the summer stuff going on. I'm far from complaining...just stating a few facts. This week I've been scrambling to get all the sheets and towels washed, clean out all the closets, clean out fridges, finish up editing a couple photoshoots, cramming in doctor and therapy appointments, finish up a new home project in our dining room, driving to and from swim team...you know, the stuff you do before a trip.

I thought I'd never make it here as I sat in the lab with Lucy yesterday. She had one more blood draw for a test one of the miriad of her doctors requested, and I really wanted to get it done before we left. I finally got a window of time 45 minutes before we were supposed to leave for the airport, called my "friend" at the lab (she knows us pretty well by now...this sweet lady with a southern accent) to see if she could fit us in and raced over there. After four pricks they still couldn't get a good draw. I sat there trying to hold on to Lu through her desperate screaming and body flailing, a task made more slippery and difficult because by then her body was covered in her tears and sweat and drool as she was trying frantically to get out of my grasp. I felt so bad for her, the nurses trying to help, and me as I sat watching the minutes slip by wondering how I could ever make it for my flight but torn because I wanted to get this out of the way so bad.

So I left, 15 minutes later than I really needed to, with tears welling up in my eyes. All that time I could have spent at home doing other things to lessen the stress for Dave with all the other kids. A failed attempt at something we have to go do all over again when we get home (since they didn't get any blood). I drove home through blurred eyes wondering when to call it quits. When to just stop all this running around in circles that gets us nowhere. When to stop listening to doctors and just snuggle up this baby and forget about all this darn medical stuff.

The answer of course, is never. I can't give up. We need to go on and turn over every stone we can, gather all the info. humanly possible. But at least we get a break. No more doctors for a whole month.

Now that's reason for a big sigh of relief!

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